Hardcore Bowhunter

[fasteddie]

You might be a Hard Core Bowhunter if:--

1. You have more parts than bows laying around the workshop;

2. You have 47 dozen aluminum arrows in various sizes ... none of which are straight;

3. Your archery tacklebox is bigger than your car trunk;

4. Your family is used to the smell of doe pee and cow in heat lure;

5. You have more sets of camo than you do business suits;

6. You bathe more in hunting camp than you do at home;

7. The neighbors no longer call the cops to report a scream when you're practicing with your bugle before elk season;

8. You've got more McKenzie body parts laying around your yard than most pro shops have in stock;

9. Your bowhunting setup cost more than your first honeymoon;

10. Your kids and dog forget who you are during the hunting seasons;

11. You only spend 8 hours a day at work so you can spend 16 hours a day sitting in a stand on the weekend;

12. Your grandmother/grandfather/uncle/aunt/cousin/etc have each been buried more than once and you attended each funeral ... or at least the boss thinks so;

13. You've ever mixed up your pee bottle and your thermos in the dark (My Joe this coffee sure has a whang to it!);

14. You spend more than 3 hours a day reading threads on the Bowsite!

15. You know the date of bow season but can't remember your anniversary.

  16. Your scared of heights, but, have no problem hanging on a tree 20' up with one arm trying to hang a stand with the other.

17.  Squirrels in your hunting area treat you like family.

18. Your regular street clothes are all shades of brown and green.

19. You're license plate is "BUKFVR", or "BUGLER".

20. A corner of your garage looks like a display for a museum entitled, "The History of Treestands."

21. You costantly estimate the range to everything

22. While watching tv that shows any game animal, you always look for the best angle and time to shoot.

23. It kills you to get up at 6:00 to go to work but you pop out of bed at 3:30 to go hunt.

24: If your neighbor's wife asks you to move your Mckenzies because her kids think they are real deer and they want you to stop killin em.

25: If you have eye-bolts screwed into the ceiling of the garage to hang deer on.

26: If you keep extra rolls of carpet around to put in the camper instead of trying to wash the blood out.

27. You go to a 3D shoot on Valentine's day and just leave flowers on the table

28. You compare the insides of your wife during a C section to deliver your baby to a gutpile. Been there, done that, regret the comment for the rest of my life.

29: If you've got targets placed strategically throughout the house so you can shoot after dark, with walkways blocked by baby gates to prevent injury to your spouse and kids.

30: If you've got a tree stand mounted to your chimney for practice.

31. The people who take your order by phone at Cabelas ask how the wife and kids are doing.     32. You wander aimlessly through the hunting department of your local Wal-Mart during the offseason.

33. Your wife has told you that she refuses to wear any more of that funny smelling "perfume" thats comes in the little brown bottle.

34. your buddies ask you how is it hanging and you say there not there draggin.

35. You go thru the drive-thru at a fast food joint and you're 3 year old child yells out at the intercom that he wants a super-sized order of backstraps.

36. You firmly anchor the mouthpiece of the phone to the same place at the corner of your mouth every time you use it.

37:If you have your own tray in the refrigerator for scents and lures    38:Your wife buys all your socks and underware at the bow shop     39:If your wife dosen't ware white or brown PJ's to bed during hunting season     40.If your water bill triple's during oct.& nov.     41.If your family eats dinner without ya during oct&nov     42.If your kids were afraid to have Santa land his sled on your roof

43. If your children have watched more hunting videos than Barney.

44. You've ever gotten road rash from sliding down the tree you're hugging;

45. The term "tree-hugger" to you means someone who bought a cheap deer stand;

46. You shave your arm more testing your broadheads than you shave your face using a razor;

47. You've ever used the words "Bubba, treestand, bigun and gutpile," in the same sentence;

48. You take out a third mortgage on your home so you join a deer lease;

49. Every right hand glove you own is missing 3 fingers.

50. For 4 months of the year your trunk looks like a search and rescue supply depot.

51. You have knee surgery on December 23 and you still go hunting on Christmas day.

52. You walk in the house before dark and your wife asks you what the he__ you are doing home.

53. Your kids don't realize they sell meat at grocery stores.

54. Your daughter thinks 'camo' is a color.

55. Your reindeer Christmas decorations have arrow holes in them.

56. You find ways to fit archery terms into your nickname.

57. You've got more than one arrow hole in the side of your shed/house/garage;

58. You've developed a taste for crackers with either vienna sausages, potted meat and/or Spam;

59. SPAM Mail is how your wife describes you after a weekend hunting trip;

60. You're more concerned about your feathers staying dry than catching pneumonia;

61. Your wife finds the equivalent to three rolls of toilet paper in bits and pieces in her washing machine after washing your hunting pants;

62. You own any item of clothing that carries a tag with a word ending in "TEX" written on it.

63. You can field dress a deer faster than you can change a baby;

64. After about a month of bow season the lady next door asks your wife if she is separated.

65. You Are legally blind but can hit a quarter at 40 yds

66. You have your kids put a 3-d target in the back of your 78 ford, and drive really slow. This allows you to practice on moving shots.

67. You have tree steps in all your tool boxes.

68. you show up befoe dark and your wife asks "How big is it"?

69. We know we are hard core bowhunters, when we can not number these things in order!

70. You have looked at Bill Jordan/ Will Primos/ ect... more than anyone else lately.

71. You have seen more hunting videos than you've seen videos with your wife/girlfriend/boyfriend!

72. You have had more bows in your life than toothbrushes.

73. You paint your car different colors of green, brown, gray, and black.

74. You shoot your bow so much that your release breaks!

75. You say the word buck,elk,moose,bear,caribou, or turkey in every sebtence.

76. when you take family vacations in the car and your wife has to drive at dusk and dawn so that I... er you can search the ditches and fields for deer.

77. You re driving and you spend more time checking the fields for deer that watching the road ahead.

78. You see a painting of woods and fields, and you analyze it for the best stand placement.

79. You read the word does in a sentence, and you automatically think of female whitetail deer.

[burmjohn]

Hah

[Karpteach]

Good stuff . Only 60 of these apply. Am I a "somewhat" Hardcore Bowhunter? LOL 

[burmjohn]

You got 60!? Wow   Yes I think that qualifies...

[Geno C]

LOL i really hope you copy and pasted that from somwhere!!

and didnt type it

[burmjohn]

You know when your a hardcore hunter when you type of a list of 70+ things that define a hardcore bow hunter

[Doc]

Those are all funny, but it is interesting how many of them really do apply.

Doc

[MuzzyLoader]

Those are all funny, but it is interesting how many of them really do apply.

Doc

I agree Doc - I was amazed at how many were 'dead-on'!  Then again, after almost 50 years of hunting I guess some have to stick. 

[Geno C]

You know when your a hardcore hunter when you type of a list of 70+ things that define a hardcore bow hunter

lol seriously...

they are true tho

[sweet old bill]

sure sound like my place. I started out just being a archer and then I started to make custom arrows, that led to one road in the house, next it grew to a double car garage, also started with 1 3D deer target, now a total of 45 3D's or 2D's. Now retired the archery business but have 6 compound bows that are mine, 4 recurve bows,1 wife bow, and grand kids bow  2.