For all our retired mambers

[Culvercreek hunt club]

Yesterday I was at my local SAM'S CLUB buying a large bag of Purina

dog chow for my loyal pet, Biscuit, the Wonder Dog, and was in the

checkout line when the woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

What did she think I had, an elephant? So since I'm retired and have

little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I

was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't,

because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50

pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes

coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that

it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat

one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so

it works well and I was going to try it again.. (I have to mention here that

practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the

dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff an

Irish Setter's ass and a car hit us both.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was

laughing so hard.

Sam's Club won't let me shop there anymore.

Better watch what you ask retired people! They have all the time in the

world to think of crazy things to say.

[Deerthug]

That is too funny!!

[growalot]

[Elmo]

Hilarious!

[catskillkid]

Good one!

[noodle one]

I love it.

[First-light]

OMG soooo funny!

[nyantler]

Great Story!!!

[rob1114]

Man I wish I was in your line, would have made my day

[Culvercreek hunt club]

Can't take credit....it was an email

[G-Man]

good one!