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Happy 4th of July to Everyone


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11 minutes ago, Nomad said:

Enjoy the 4th !

This is the last day many will have ten fingers , and nobody knows who .

I tried to blow up an old friend of mine last night.

Had a 4 foot roman candle stuck down in a tube, sunk in the ground. The kind that shoots small mortar balls out of it. Standard procedure, nothing new. 

Damn thing lured us into a false sense of security for the first few balls. Everything went fine. 

Then, it took the liberty to hop up out of the tube, and aim itself at the small crowd of innocent bystanders, seated over by the camp.

The next ball shot out, and like a heat seeking missile, lazered it's way directly between Don's feet, stopping right under his chair. 

At the perfect time, it blew up. In the flash of beautiful light, I could see many stunned and horrified expressions.

Then the net one went off before I could react. 

It too, shot straight for Don.

When that one blew up, it illuminated a panicked scene.  

Empty chairs, people running, and Don's right leg appeared to be in flames. He was quickly vacating the immediate vicinity at a height of about a foot off the ground. Which is no small feat, seeing as Don is 80.

I finally was able to kick it in a different direction, and the rest of the balls shot off erratically into the woods in apparent search for new victims.

After the evil thing spent the last of it's bloodlust, I went over to look for survivors. I found a small group of people excitedly slapping the still levitated Don's leg to stifle the flames, while another thoughtful lady dumped water down the front of him.

He lost a sock, about 6" of pant leg, and the tongue of his sneaker was MIA.

True story.

He's ok though. Great times were had.

HAPPY 4TH!

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Work party many years ago . A guy is holding a powerful but unlit m80 type device , like he’s going to throw it ,so back along the side of his head .

Another guy came up behind him and lit it , once he realized that,  he was able to let go which saved his fingers, but his right ear never heard as well as prior .

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